Infj and sex

Added: Teaira Thole - Date: 11.10.2021 04:31 - Views: 45588 - Clicks: 9715

I've read a bunch of places that INFJ's experience sex in a potentially non-normal way. For example:. From the sexual perspective, INFJs look at intimacy as an excellent opportunity to express their love and make their partner happy. They enjoy becoming one with their partner, physically and spiritually, even if just for a short while. People with this personality type are likely to be very passionate and enthusiastic partners. Thankfully, she's very sexual and even more thankfully very faithful.

But she calls herself "a shallow bowl. She has no concept of my experience and it intimidates her. She feels like I jump off into a sea of intimacy with her, but without her. On a good day, she is deeply moved to be there for the event and for me.

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On a bad day, she feels like a prop in a ritual that has no meaning for her. We meet in the middle a lot. I hold back on some of my tendencies and she pushes herself to be open to more meaning. I'm comfortable with that, but sometimes she isn't. We're trying to get over a bad spell in our marriage right now, and she's particularly focused on the sexual disconnect. Normally, we have sex a bunch and we're past our problems. Now sex is one of the key issues. Do yall have any of the same experiences? How can I understand it myself and help her understand?

Just as Infj and sex usually don't have orgasms at the same instant, there are times when there's something very intense going on for her when I'm just there helping out. I am there and willing all good things, but I'm not having the same experience. And I'm moved and Infj and sex and entirely present, but not in the same place as her.

That has to be okay. Usually that's enough, but right now its touchy. Any thoughts or experiences yall have on that would be helpful. Your wife sounds like me a long with a lot of other INTJs, we enjoy thinking about sex more then we enjoy actually having sex.

I am an INTJ female too and I don't think sex is the be all and end all of the relationships and I find that it's fine to not express love that way. Sex is very primal for me - it's enjoyable and I love it but it's so I think it's best to not expect from each other the same level of emotional attachment each of you have towards sex.

As long as you're both getting it when you want to, and both of you have fun doing it, it shouldn't be a big deal. To me it is strange that she would feel herself a prop in a ritual when she is really the object of worship. Maybe guide her thinking to those lines if we are going with the spiritual route? I have a lot of the same hesitancy to dress things up in spiritual language as perhaps you do. It's just commonly used in describing INFJ's sexual experience. I suppose the idea that it is spiritual, which I have no interest in refuting but don't care either way, is central to the issue here.

I would want to describe my experience as tremendously intimate and connected and communal. Hers isn't the same. It's physically intimate and emotionally close, but that's about it. So with what am I connecting if I feel so connected and she doesn't? I'm communing with who, given that she's very aware that she's not at communion? Either its some sort of masturbatory head-trip or it is spiritual, or maybe if that's the way you swing there's not much of a distinction between the two interpretations.

To some extent she is a prop, as I am. We all are in sex, to some degree. I'm the guy; she's the woman. I'm serving as a representation of "man" for her sexual experience, and vice versa. So to me there is a bit of legitimate concern if my reaction to "woman" in sex is so strong that it leaves her alone in her head. It becomes like she's a dis-interested atheist actor in a nativity scene.

It doesn't engender the closeness and identification she wants in sex. To be clear, I'm not weeping or chanting or getting the quakes during sex. I'm just getting something out of it that she's not aware she's giving. Which is weird. I don't think that this is an issue of spiritual vs.

It sounds like the real issue is that she doesn't feel a sense of connection with you, even when you feel one with her. If she feels like a prop on a bad day, that's really not good because it indicates that she feels used or pressured to have sex when she doesn't want to. I understand your last statement, but if one of you isn't into it I don't really think it's healthy to ignore that, even if it's to please the other.

That sounds like it would create resentment over time. It should be something that she and you can enjoy It can be largely emotional for women rather than physical, and if she doesn't feel like she's on the same wavelength as you it probably isn't going to do anything for her But as with everything, the main thing is to have open, honest and direct communication. It's important that you can both express how you're feeling about it, respect one another and go from there. Sometimes the sexual issues Infj and sex symptoms of emotional ones. I appreciate your comments.

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There are a couple things I could have been more direct about. But your comments are helpful. There hasn't been any pressure to have sex in our relationship in a long time.

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We've been married almost 16 years and we've been having sex every day for the last ten or so. Its less emotional for her than for me, but we know each other very well. She's more concerned than I am if we skip sex very much when we're not at odds. But there is a key difference in experience. When she is fully emotionally committed, and totally there I'm good.

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And she's there almost all the time. The issue is that she feels I'm so much more "there" than she is. She's intimidated by what she sees in my experience.

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Her preference would probably be for more, less intense sex. Which seems to be a personality thing, at least to me. We are having an emotional issue right now, but the matter I mentioned is more general. Found the internet! Sex and being INFJ, having sex with somebody different. Posted by 7 years ago.

For example: From the sexual perspective, INFJs look at intimacy as an excellent opportunity to express their love and make their partner happy.

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Unfortunately, my wife is the opposite. My go-to model in talking to her is this: Just as we usually don't have orgasms at the same instant, there are times when there's something very intense going on for her when I'm just there helping out. Sort by: best. Continue this thread. Thanks for your insight. More posts from the infj community. Created Jul 26, Top posts april 22nd Top posts of april, Top posts Back to Top.

Infj and sex

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